Everything Happens for a Reason...
My husband & I live in Providence, RI (the city in which he works) and I commute about an hour north for my job in Worcester, MA. The drive has been awful for me -- I know some people do well with long drives, but I am not one of them -- so about eight months ago, we decided to look at places to move in the middle (so we'd each have about a half-hour commute).
We quickly learned that there were no rental options (literally NONE) because the "in between" consists of small, rural New England towns, so we went to the bank and got pre-approved to buy a home. Thanks to the low down-payment options, we could (barely) afford a home in the area. So began our longggg house-hunting process, which we expected to be much more fun than it actually was. Our money could get us VERY little, so we adjusted our expectations and found a 1,000 square foot home in a nice neighborhood. We put in an offer (literally the most we could afford) and it was rejected. We adjusted our expectations yet again and decided to explore townhouses, so we found one that seemed nice enough, put in an offer, negotiated a little, and it was accepted! We were thrilled. Then came the inspection... and let's just say that it would have cost us MUCH more than we could afford to get the townhome in a reasonable move-in condition (and the homeowners weren't willing to put in the money), so we walked away. We were out the $750 we paid for inspection fees, but we decided to give up the search because it seemed like the universe was working against us. We were so frustrated that there was so little we could afford, but even more frustrated that the two best options we found didn't work out.
After all of this happened, we re-evaluated and decided that buying a home just to have somewhere to live was NOT a good enough reason for us to buy. Buying a home should be about putting down roots and becoming part of a community... not about lessening a commute and NOTHING else. Plus, we were further from our families than we wanted to be long-term and hoped that something would work out.
Fast-forward seven-months, when some big changes occurred at my job (restructuring that resulted in the "resignation" of my boss) and my husband & I talked a lot about what this meant for us. I decided that I was not happy with my role, and especially with the changes, so we decided to explore the possibility of moving back to our "home" city in Western NY state. I found only three jobs to apply to (two of them part time but wonderful enough to be worth it) and Sean applied to about eight or ten. About a week after applying, I was called and asked for a phone interview for one of the part time jobs. It went well, and I was invited to campus to interview in person. They were hoping to interview me as soon as possible (the following week), and I just happened to be visiting my family for a long weekend and could easily make the interview work. After meeting with the staff, learning more about the job and seeing the campus, I felt completely comfortable and really hoped that they felt the same about me.
Sean hadn't heard anything yet, and so we had to have some difficult conversations about what we would do if I got hired (particularly part time) and he did not -- especially because he carries our health insurance. We ultimately made the difficult decision to live apart temporarily (if need be) until he found work in NY.
Five days later, my references were getting called and I knew that, at the very least, I was in the "top two" candidates for the job. And then everything changed! Sean got an e-mail about a job that he had applied to the day before, expressing interest in him as a candidate. He was invited to interview that week, which he did, and he was offered the job on the spot!
The same day that I received an official offer, Sean talked with HR at his new job and was told the pay range for his new job... a $5,000 pay cut from his current position. Because the cost of living is SIGNIFICANTLY lower in the new city, we knew that we could make it work (although maintaining his current salary would have been nice)! Later that day, he received a call from his new boss saying that she negotiated on his behalf and was able to offer him $2,500 MORE than he is currently making... a full $7,500 more each year than we expected him to make!
Last but not least, we are going to be staying at my late grandmother's house (which my family owns and is currently on the market) because we have no time to find an apartment between now & our move, and we welcome the opportunity to live rent-free for a few months to save some money. The house is about 50 minutes from our jobs, but we'll be able to carpool to save gas money.
When all is said and done, everything that could have gone wrong when we tried to buy a house in Massachusetts DID, but the entire process of moving back to NY has been freakishly seamless - so much so that I cannot deny that some things are truly meant to be. For us, this is one of them<3
We quickly learned that there were no rental options (literally NONE) because the "in between" consists of small, rural New England towns, so we went to the bank and got pre-approved to buy a home. Thanks to the low down-payment options, we could (barely) afford a home in the area. So began our longggg house-hunting process, which we expected to be much more fun than it actually was. Our money could get us VERY little, so we adjusted our expectations and found a 1,000 square foot home in a nice neighborhood. We put in an offer (literally the most we could afford) and it was rejected. We adjusted our expectations yet again and decided to explore townhouses, so we found one that seemed nice enough, put in an offer, negotiated a little, and it was accepted! We were thrilled. Then came the inspection... and let's just say that it would have cost us MUCH more than we could afford to get the townhome in a reasonable move-in condition (and the homeowners weren't willing to put in the money), so we walked away. We were out the $750 we paid for inspection fees, but we decided to give up the search because it seemed like the universe was working against us. We were so frustrated that there was so little we could afford, but even more frustrated that the two best options we found didn't work out.
After all of this happened, we re-evaluated and decided that buying a home just to have somewhere to live was NOT a good enough reason for us to buy. Buying a home should be about putting down roots and becoming part of a community... not about lessening a commute and NOTHING else. Plus, we were further from our families than we wanted to be long-term and hoped that something would work out.
Fast-forward seven-months, when some big changes occurred at my job (restructuring that resulted in the "resignation" of my boss) and my husband & I talked a lot about what this meant for us. I decided that I was not happy with my role, and especially with the changes, so we decided to explore the possibility of moving back to our "home" city in Western NY state. I found only three jobs to apply to (two of them part time but wonderful enough to be worth it) and Sean applied to about eight or ten. About a week after applying, I was called and asked for a phone interview for one of the part time jobs. It went well, and I was invited to campus to interview in person. They were hoping to interview me as soon as possible (the following week), and I just happened to be visiting my family for a long weekend and could easily make the interview work. After meeting with the staff, learning more about the job and seeing the campus, I felt completely comfortable and really hoped that they felt the same about me.
Sean hadn't heard anything yet, and so we had to have some difficult conversations about what we would do if I got hired (particularly part time) and he did not -- especially because he carries our health insurance. We ultimately made the difficult decision to live apart temporarily (if need be) until he found work in NY.
Five days later, my references were getting called and I knew that, at the very least, I was in the "top two" candidates for the job. And then everything changed! Sean got an e-mail about a job that he had applied to the day before, expressing interest in him as a candidate. He was invited to interview that week, which he did, and he was offered the job on the spot!
The same day that I received an official offer, Sean talked with HR at his new job and was told the pay range for his new job... a $5,000 pay cut from his current position. Because the cost of living is SIGNIFICANTLY lower in the new city, we knew that we could make it work (although maintaining his current salary would have been nice)! Later that day, he received a call from his new boss saying that she negotiated on his behalf and was able to offer him $2,500 MORE than he is currently making... a full $7,500 more each year than we expected him to make!
Last but not least, we are going to be staying at my late grandmother's house (which my family owns and is currently on the market) because we have no time to find an apartment between now & our move, and we welcome the opportunity to live rent-free for a few months to save some money. The house is about 50 minutes from our jobs, but we'll be able to carpool to save gas money.
When all is said and done, everything that could have gone wrong when we tried to buy a house in Massachusetts DID, but the entire process of moving back to NY has been freakishly seamless - so much so that I cannot deny that some things are truly meant to be. For us, this is one of them<3
Hi Emily! I just found your blog and was compelled to comment on this article. As you know we have a lot in common, but this completely struck a chord with me. My high school quote was "Everything happens for a reason, and it all works out in the end." Shawn and I looked for houses for a year with no luck, and as you well remember I searched for a full time job in student affairs for almost a year without any real luck until I got my part time position at Cornell (where I am not exactly utilizing my degree to the point where I should be... but it works and pays the bills). Even while here I have been trying to get another position and searching on the side to no avail. Finally, Shawn and I decided maybe there is a reason we keep hitting road blocks with the house... getting a full time job... and decided this was a perfect time to start a family. The same week I found out I was pregnant, was the same week I was offered a job in alumni affairs... and I had to turn it down, but even though it was what I thought I wanted for so long, it was easy to walk away from because I knew I was getting the job I was meant to get, being a new mommy :) All of the struggle, stress, and complete frustration of hearing no over and over from jobs and not finding a house was meant to be so we could start our family and have our son. Thank you for writing this blog I love it! Glad you are doing so well! - Teri
ReplyDeleteHi Teri! I realized that I haven't commented back on this yet and I am so sorry about that! Thanks for reading - I really, really appreciate it. You're totally right - at the end of the day, things really do happen the way they're supposed to and right now you are absolutely meant to be a mom! It's amazing how things work out, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading! I promise to get in touch soon so we can get together now that we're so much closer :)
Emily